情绪化

不懂何时我快变成草莓族，
那么的脆弱，
那么承受不了挫折，
一碰就脆！

一直以来我都把挫折当训练，
把挑战当好友，
但最近的我，
好像变得很疲倦，
身心都很累，
累到我睡12小时，
还是起不来。。。。

我又再次走入低潮，
当那一却无奈，
那一却不辛，
那一片片黑云，
下不完的大雨，
这时，
脆弱的我，
真的承不下去。。。。

我最讨厌就是，
那些不好总是一次过的找你，
一点也没给你时间疗伤！
一次有一次的刺激你，
但，
这就是人生。。。
无时无刻都在挑战你，
尝试你的程度，
看你有多少的忍耐。。。

用另一方面想，
或许，
挫折并完全是坏的，
它让我领悟很多，
它教我很多，
面对它，
我才知道我的能力，
它还能让我知道，
谁才是真心对你的。。。

或许，
现在的我在山中，
在往难处爬，
在这时刻，
我已用了全神力量，
的往前爬。。。
它用尽了我所有的精力，
但只要我要着牙根，
过了这一关，
我又向前多一步。。。。

写完了。。。
感觉较好了。。。
情绪，
就像下雨一样，
一下子就天晴了！

The journey of JOB HUNTING

it was another life journey,

start once i out from student identity,

the process was AWESOME,

why?

it was the unforgettable experience,

the one month hunting period,

the whole process was like sitting on roller coaster,

sometime up sometime down,

it begin with queue up for game,

sent application and hunt for right job,

then waiting for the roller coaster to move,

sometime it move to higher point when move to new stage,

sometime it drop to lower point when no news,

i m great that i was quite lucky for the whole process,

where it provide me choice to choose which i want,

it struggle and hard to make the right decision,

along the way,

there was few opportunity which i lucky to came across,

but i was target the right one,

i would like to start it right,

rather be sorry that i start wrong for first time,

so i think i rather to choosy and picky,

i admit i was this type of graduate...

after the long journey,

finally i reach the end of the journey,

after the long process of apply, wait, interviews ...

the process was long,

i been using 1 month waiting for application process,

mb because i was not available for interview since i at kch,

however,

i was glad to experience a number of interview,

i am happy that i pass each stage,

the happiness when u reach to the last stage of it,

i even receive opportunity where i not even interview but was great offer,

some i only go for phone interview then was quite good offer as well,

my job hunting experience was GREAT,

it was differ kind of experience,

i gratitude i go through it,

it really test my patient and my skills,

where it was a very begin stage to knock the door of the market,

now it time to step in,

hope i do great!

7月+ 8 月 《之旅》

这两个月，

我的旅程是超出我预料，

是一个《NO PLANNING》的开始，

很多人问我，

实习后有什们打算呢？？？

我总会回答：

没打算就是我的打算！

两个月内

我竟然到处跑，到处玩，

去了好几个地方。。。

实习完了，

我第一个的旅程是和Psykid 的四天三夜槟城毕业旅，

整个旅程注重于集合大家，

毕竟未来的日子，

大家将往自已的路走，

见面也较少，集在一起也很难，

但无论我们在那，

我们都是psykid 一家人。

在一起的时光。。。·@penang 之旅

我们一起疯狂的照片。。。@@

毕业旅完之后，

我向太平半天游，

去尝试恩万店的美食，

然后逛逛太平中心。。。

我和melia拍下我们在太平的证据。。。

下一站，

我在9日-10日，

和波哥去找佩韵, chin fang 他们，

跑去kluang的uk farm,

又去organic farm...

过了接近大自然的一天，

过后我们去马六甲，

游了半天。。。

美丽的大自然。。。

yeah, 坐了四个钟车程，我终于来到UK FARM了！！！

来到kluang 最久的kopitiam。。。那两天我喝了九杯咖啡。。。破了我人生记录。。

在我还没离开kl,

我找那好久没见的实习朋友，

来个集会，

顺便三八一下。。。

还和我的housemate,

一起集合，来个farewell meet....

这两个月我很高兴认识他们，

他们让我的两个月变得很精彩。。。

跟我坐在同一艘船的实习朋友。。。

可爱的Housemate 们。。。

13日-18日，

我，恩万和grace,

我们三人游到kota kinabalu,

我们kk之旅可说是个无计划的旅行，

只租了酒店，

临时才计划隔天的旅程，

还租了一辆viva...

三人到处跑。。

在网上看到那里好玩就驾车去，

真的有点刺激又好玩。。。。

我们租了viva,而我做了几天的司机。。。我们竟然用viva上神山，还好上的去下的回。。

我们在kk的合照。。。美丽的风景。。。为我们kk之旅留念

19日-21日，

恩万和grace,

来到我家乡kuching,

我如游客般，

带她们到处参观，

可惜，

我这导游，

住了20多年，

却对kuching的地方一知半解，

找来了我们kuching朋友eddie,

帮我想那里好玩。。。

真失礼。

在kch的合照

玩了整个7月，

我终于回来家，

静了下来，

为我的未来打算，

寻找我的方向，

也开始找工的过程。。。

8 月，

5日-10日，

临时，

我们全家决定去新加坡，

就这样我在新加坡的universal studio 过我的生日，

今年，

我的生日很特别，

不是因为有任何的庆祝，

而是出生23年，

在我出生日。

重来我出生的地方，。。

感觉有点不同。。。

好像你离开一个地方好久，

在特别的日子重游次地那种感觉。。。

Universal studio 之旅

11日-18日

我跑到kl ,

近一步的寻找工作，

也找些朋友见见面，诉诉久。。

之后的八月，

我还继续寻工过程，

过这随心所欲的日子，

几点睡和几点起，

都没关系，

日子过了轻松，

但无趣！

整个找工过程真的很难忘，

但我知道要珍惜现在那无忧无虑的日子。。

享受它吧！

*说要记录我的旅程很久以前，讲了很久，今天终于我成功写完了，大功告成！*

Inspiration!

today....

some word have inspire me,

the long forgotten dream,

a hidden dream which i left behind after rain and thunder,

i seem forget it.

but today,

a person words,

have make me feel touch,

'it was my platform' this platform can make me perform,

maybe no one can understood how this words can inspire me,

but it touch me deeply!

it burn my passion,

by watching it,

it make me realize my dream,

i din lost it,

i just temporary leave it,

an inspiration words is enough to burn my passion,

i need more effort!!!

i need see hope of my dream....

and clear the cloud of the sky,

one day my dream will appear on the sky,

with the rainbow hanging it,

where it sign,

LET OUR DREAM ROLL....

one day,

i will find the way to it,

now it just the beginning,

i need more fuel to burn......

dream....

i want to find U!

我又再次迷失方向，
在那十字路口，
不懂我要往那走。

再次的迷茫，
让我变得更慌，
时间一直在跑，
更不上节奏的我，
开始感到压力。

或许，
我早应该认清，
我要的是什么，

但，
这一却已太迟了，

或许，
我一直不曾认识自已，

开始想，
梦想，理想，
是什么？
它们好像在岁月中，
慢慢的消失。

很多感觉也一样，
不见了。

我好像失忆一样，
突然，
什么都忘了。

是不是天太暗了，
我看不到，
还是我还在睡呢？

或许，
我累了，
该休息了！

在停了，
重新找回那个我，
那个曾经有过理想，
不知天高低厚的我！

未来，
我不知道会怎样？
我也不懂要如何走。。。

或许，
我不该想那么多，
尝试一步一步的走，
可能还会看到我要走的路。

Realize

it was suddenly realize that
my previous act has it mean.

That day,
i was lost direction while driving,
at that time, every where was having traffic jam.
i turn around and tried to find shortcut,
a way out that can save my time and avoid long queue.
i tried many time,
trust my gut and instinct,
even it proved wrong at the end.
it end up,
i taken more time and still stuck in traffic.

Today,
i realize, that day act symbol my present life,
i was lost in searching my way,
i try to find direction as well as shortcut of it,
i let my emotion and impatient flow with me,
and find it like a bull with eyes cover.
i does not want the ending of my future search end up like that day,
when seat still and think,
i should stay calm and go through the path slowly,
step by step,
until the mist is gone,
and i was clear where i want to go.

it was like a FLASH

FLASH....

to describe my life event,

it was a moment,

next moment i was with another new life.

WOW

i no have many time to thinK and flash back all memory,

not even have much time to adapt all the change,

suddenly,

it gone, another new in.

recently,

i mean this 2 to 3 month,

i live in the life of speed,

all is about speed,

i wonder is it because i work at RE,

so everything on my life was in express lane?

Life at RE always running,

after end it,

i thought my busy life will stop,

and i have a good rest.

but all turn opposite,

i still busy,

what i busy, is trip and socialise!

haha,

my life everyday fully pack for 12 day,

i only have 1 day good rest at home,

the rest is OUT.

my housemate keep seeing me disappear all the time,

i merely sleep at home for 5 day,

the rest i spent my night no where else.

i was amaze with my nomad life that i not even think of.

at first,

i thought it time for me to settle down after internship,

and think about my future,

yet, i have to much thing occupied,

until i cant breath.

this need to do,

that need to do,

i even no have time to write blog for my vacation,

will write one when i fully settle down at hometown.

after internship,

my first trip is with my fellow coursemates to penang,

it was memorable trip where we all gather for the last 2 time,

hopefully still can gather more in future.

the trip make me know my coursemate more better,

some i seldom talk to,

but this trip, make me know more about each other,

as well as know more,

where each going for their future,

wishes every of them find they dream, (for those who dont know yet, include me)

and live with their dream,

most important is do something that they like.

hope everyone achieve what they want in life.

all the best psykid.

opps..

seem my post gonna to end here,

but not yet,

i still have many things haven write.

second trip,

is a short trip to taiping,

the purpose is to stop over,

and taste en wan 's shop foods and drinks,

since she said is so nice and delicious,

it true as what she said,

the coffee and foods is nice,

but i cant write a good recommendation with my limited vocabulary.

after taiping,

i stay at home for 2 day,

next day,

i went to my kluang for my next trip with my shengxue senior,

we went to zenxing organic farm,

uk farm,

on the way back,

we stop at malacca,

for that 2 day trip,

i consume 9 glass of coffee,

it because all the way,

i been induce by the aroma of coffee,

all great coffee,

make me cant resist the temptation!

it was crazy,

and break my ultimate record in my life.

the next week,

actually is this week,

i busy socialize,

i not simply socialize,

actually another way to expose what i can do in future,

few opportunities came to me,

but one thing is i not sure what i want.

i got few choice,

all the choice want me back to KL,

it seem i have more prospect here!

but i dunno whether i will be back,

actually it was great when few people said:

i have potential in their field,

thanks for that,

hope i can find out early,

what i really one,

but not simple step in any field,

due to desperate.

it better start late,

but plan well.

that all today,

finally it end.

tommorrow will begin my sabah trip.

HOORAT for another journey of life.

simply enjoy my one month vacation,

sure,

i din provide much chance to do that in future,

it can,

depend on the path i take!

THE END OF INTERNSHIP

My ship have reach the shore,

it sign the end of INTERNSHIP journey.

as well as signal

FINISHED DEGREE

I had gone thought it,

sailing thought the rolling waves and thunder storms,

as well as raining and shining day.

when flash back,

it was a memorable memory,

that i still miss and happy that i have gone thought.

during sailing,

the whole journey it was so tough,

but when i pass thought it,

i am glad and gratitude for the journey i had walked,

i had become another ME,

the better the stronger ME.

Sincerely i thank my company for this intensive training,

i know without challenging and stress,

i wont growth and developed that much.

Finally week,

it full of mix feeling,

with happy feeling when i think of it shall end soon,

with missing feeling when i think i gonna leave,

with feeling stress when i think i want close more sales last week,

at the end,

i cant really enjoy the last few day,

however,

it was bad because my sales drop this week,

with 3 pending cases,

and many still on progress,

all was hanging around,

During my sales meeting,

luckly my boss din question me why,

but other intern been question about the drop,

i guess she no longer need question me about it,

since i leaving next day.

sometime when thinking of leaving,

my face will show a big smiles,

hooray....

all colleagues and interns can see it,

some envy that i can escape the rat race soon,

while i happy i gonna to put down the burden,

before i go,

i would like to make thing clear,

settle all the things i at my hand,

i use the last day to segregate all the piles into categories,

neatly arrange to make my supervisor life easy,

so she wont curse me when i m not there.)

i was workaholic,

that i strive to send 6 resume out on my last day,

other said why i so pia,

last day dont need to do anymore,

but last day still my working day,

i dont like stop doing nothing,

since company paid,

i have my duty for it.

but too bad, i not able to follow up the candidates that i had sent out,

and report the 3 sales i had close.

During last 2 day,

my boss approach to me again,

i guess my manager have let her know i turn down the offer last week,

she want me stay back and talk to me,

for a moment since she busy,

she make things clear,

i was given another chance,

to convince my parents,

and accept offer within one month.

honestly,

i m gratitude for chance given to me,

i really have to thank my boss and manager for the offer,

even i turn them down,

they still give me another chance,

my boss said she like me,

as the way i work and enjoy to have me on board,

both of them think i have potential at this field.

i guess so,

dealing with human is what i good at.

what make me feel more gratitude is,

i asked for reference letter from my manager last week,

i was so happy she willing to give me one,

she used to said,

i wont simply give reference letter if she thought the person not deserve,

i glad she said yes,

but she might need to talk to boss and gave me later,

at that moment,

i kind of confuse,

a reference letter have to take so long?

but i realize she actually wish i stay and gave me second chance...(my assumption)

last day,

i was surprise when i saw a letter on my table,

when i was conducting interview,

at the moment i felt so touch,

i felt the company treat me so good.

it great honor to be able to work at RE.

But too bad,

it not the path i will choose.

i will never forget the day i was there,

i will always appreciate everything that RE gave to me,

it teach me a lot,

and built right attitude with me,

i hope with all the foundation that RE laid on me,

which help me in the future,

at the end,

i feel proud as intern at RE.

it was my honor to be there.

Thank everyone who accompany me on board.

my workstation at RE

WEEK 7 & 8 Report

Finally the last 2 week,

soon,

i will finish my internship,

when i gone through all the suck,

finally,

there are some reward,

this week,

the ship sail into big sea and nearly reach to the shore,

the efforts i put did harvest some seed,

i getting improve in close sales,

this week during the sales meeting,

my boss praise few of us include me for the result,

but what confuse me is,

i din feel happy at all,

at that moment,

i feel more burden.

in term of resume out,

i had increase so much,

roughly 50/60 ratio,

so it quite a lot,

but a lot does not mean will close sales,

i manage close few sales,

some success some fail,

but overall is quite good even it haven reach target.

it still on top compare to other intern and some permanent staff.

week 8,

it begin with new experience,

it was a sudden opening,

when my supervisor shout she need a secretary on 2pm,

at that time, it was 9am something.

i was busy flip through,

all my databases and search jobstreet,

and keep calling non stop finding candidate to work at 2pm,

at the same time,

have to meet the criteria of the position,

what more is i need to do tele-interview,

which is my first time,

thank to my supervisor,

she let me do it for my first time.

after about 10 calls,

i manage got one,

and close a sales that day.

my supervisor praise me for good job,

even though i cant match a position in half hour compare to singaporean,

but i manage to do it as in roughly 4 hour as an intern,

*clap**

at week 8,

the amount of resume out decrease,

but i manage to close higher no of sales,

i felt extremely stress when i saw the no drop,

everyday i push myself hard,

and i gave pressure to myself,

luckly

my boss din question me why drop during sales meeting,

instead she praise i done good job in writing comment in resume,

she said comment does not need to be long,

as long as it tell more about the candidate.

huh....

i thought she want to correct my comment due to bad language,

cause she done that on the first sales meeting and correct the comment of other consultant.

at the begin of week 8,

my manager call me into boardroom and discuss with me,

it was a good call,

what i had done actually got recognition,

cause she said she will like to recommend me as permanent consultant,

she said if i interest she will tell my boss,

i thought my boss does not know this matter,

it just her thought that i have done good job,

she said she saw potential in me,

and let me know the development in company.

next 2 day,

my boss gave me task,

ask me to lead n guide new permanent consultant to do a task,

then i quite curious why she want me to do so,

i had make a guess,

she try to test me,

it prove i m right,

she approach me next day,

and said good job for the task.

she start to told me about the offer,

she talked to me a while,

let me know how she think about me,

she said she actually observe my performance,

wow,

i been observe all the time,

stress up when think about it,

she said she happy with my performance,

and i have the attitude they want,

what surprise me is i contribute my idea when i give some suggestion during training,

my manager actually do some adjustment due to my question,

suprising,

i told i have step on the boom,

by suggest things that oppose them,

i thought my manager think bad about it,

but at the end it show that,

sometime, crazy action do paid.

when done some crazy things,

i had to bear the risk of it,

i may have good or bad consequences,

i m happy i had the positive one.

finally week,

i felt happy with my progress,

i m glad i got the recognition by offer job,

it was a great achievement so far,

at first i thought they are just suggestion,

but when my boss n manager both came to me,

i believe both of them recognize what i done.

i was a great return,

after gone though tough moment,

and at the end my effort did paid some.

as conclusion,

this internship really a great training for me,

things better as day pass,

and it end with good ending.

next week is finally week for me.

i will write finally report for it.

Week 6 of Intern

Only left 2 week,

i will finish my intern,

when flash back,

the journey was not any easy one.

i walked it full of tears and sweats,

i dunno what should i described how i feel,

in dilemma i guess,

i know i will miss my intern life,

i really feel great i walked through it,

i always realize,

when i really went thought the tough moment,

i really appreciate how far the journey i had passed,

this week,

it another great leap for me,

after 6 week struggle,

i can start harvest slowly,

in term of resume out,

i almost achieve daily target,

and approximately sent 8-10 resume out,

as more resume out,

more higher chance close sales.

close sale is what i strive each day,

but i dunno why i din feel happy at all when i close one,

i remembered my supervisor talk to me one day,

how you feel when close sale?

i said nothing at all,

i feel nothing cause waiting too long,

really truth,

i feel more pressure when close sales,

cause one i achieve a certain level,

that mean more higher level to go.

as day pass,

the environment getting compete,

it just like a war game,

every intern fight like army,

seek for achieve.

we have 2 office,

mine one is at upper floor,

we have another lower floor,

but this 2 floor,

is hell at upper and heaven at lower,

upper flower really compete like hell,

everyone want to perform,

everyday when report the number,

i can feel the tense of it,

i still have 2 week to go,

i dunno i suppose to feel relieve,

or felt great cause it gonna to end.

as i said,

it was an intense training,

it was!

this week,

i with one of my senior colleague organize june birthday party,

we discuss and plan at the day before,

domino pizza + some gift for 2 bd gals,

so we need collect 10 buck from everyone,

i incharge collect money,

while my colleague incharge order foods and buying,

my colleague was shock of my when i beg 2 candle from secret recipe,

where we really need a candle to make it like bd party.

my manager seem happy with the celebration,

she thank me before she went.

but

next day,

i hear rumor that some colleague complaint that one of colleague din join,

and some complaint why bd gals dunno nid pay,

i realize,

at work no matter how good u make,

there are people have opinion.

i start realize why they bring so many intern into office,

cause we are great tools,

it teach us a very realistic world lesson,

which the world out there was so compete,

one things i realize is

no matter how much effort you put,

people only see RESULT.

sometime, this job require luck,

same position,

same environment,

but some can achieve some cant.

effort + luck sometime play a part,

my relationship will colleague more better,

as we have more time together while at lunch,

still left 2 week,

i will left,

but now as day pass i get feel more pressure,

this week,

sales meeting,

my boss congrat a few intern include me for perform this week,

i din feel great at all,

all was stress,

it seem like i bad at stress management,

my daily work was busy non stop,

since i start work,

i never stop my hand doing work until i back from office,

i m the first or second one into office,

the last few go back,

sometime,

i wonder why i so pia,

after all,

i only had my few buck allowance,

but at the end,

i know i learn more than any intern,

cause i fall and make mistake than them,

there are a words make me go through the whole intern,

thank the person make your life difficult,

i guess i should thank to the company,

for making my intern as an intensive program,

i really thank from my heart,

for provide a great platform for me to learn.

people learn more when they fall,

we learn most when we difficult,

when life push you till the end,

what u can do is push back,

this is what i done.

still left one week + when i wrote this,

hope it was a great memory one.

Week 5 of my internship journey

This week never be the easy one!

again it was full of challenges,

yet it make my emotion rolls up and down,

this week started,

with a nervous result of handling the report last friday,

surprise,

nothing happen on monday,

which we have training that day,

but i guess my boss know what i had done,

it was so sudden she approach me,

and said how well i been train,

all her words have hidden meaning,

she din mention what i had done,

just pats my shoulder a number of time,

i still figure out what does it mean.

Then,

i thought nothing gonna happen,

i thought i was stepping on inactive bomb,

but,

another unexpected is,

finally my manager talked to me,

i guessed a good one gua,

she make things clear to me,

let me know what is the 2 priority target,

and clear my thought of impossible to reach,

it end up she does not scold me,

but taught me like a lecturer.

i received call from my uni supervisor,

she said she will pay visit on thurday,

when she came,

i intro to her what i had done,

told her all about my company,

then my supervisor meet uni supervisor,

they have a talk,

overall i think they gave good comment except i m not a good sales person,

that make me so down for the rest of the week,

not only that,

make things come together,

all make me feel i was at hell,

all things make me feel so pressure,

until i felt unbreathable,

many things keep floating in my mind,

i was so stress up until wanna to burn up,

my supervisor get me a lot stress,

and the office environment getting competitive as more intern come in,

i had to work harder to compete,

i start to realize and learn a lesson,

how cruel the world,

no matter how much effort you put,

what people see is RESULT!

what make me open my eyes is

I learn a great lesson this week,

i now more realize how important is PEOPLE SKILL!

without it you life was like SUCK!

as week pass,

thing getting stressful,

all challenges have level up,

i need to clear my emotion before i can ready for another great challenges,

since i had 2 day weekend rest,

i try to clear all the emotion rubbish,

i not sure it clear,

but no choice,

it should be clear no matter what,

on monday,

all was set to race.

i think before i end,

another good news is i manage close one sale this week,

i was relieve once the candidate sign the contract,

before,

i pray hard for no more trouble,

luckly it success close!

today,

i went all the way to pj to listen to a talk,

what she spoke like touching my inner heart,

she said:

when you so suffer that you cant go ahead,

think it was a turning point,

all the suffer happen to be teach us lesson,

to make us strong!

for a moment,

it so touch,

i can feel my eyes roll,

it touch my heart deeply.

i believe all this are some part of test,

to test how much i can be strengthen,

how far i can walk,

all this challenge is to make me growth and strong.

remember,

always thank to the person who gave u hard time,

they make u growth!

next week,

i hope i had more positive growth and mental ready for what it come,

enjoy the challenge,

and go for it!s

The week 4 intern journey

it pass fast yet memorable,

the challenges getting tough and more as time pass,

week 4 never be the week to relax,

one again,

it was whole new experiences,

this week what new is our office have new 7 intern on board,

suddenly our office become crowdly,

it was first time i need to compete to call with 7 line available,

not only phone line,

water as well become limited source,

not need to say for pc,

before that,

few consultants have to share,

now more people with one pc!!!

the interns come at wed,

3 has been allocated same level as mine,

while other 4 is at lower level,

then i been told to attend training,

that where the disaster begin,

when i start to step on the bom,

it happen when my manager brief us what is our daily target,

60 calls per day to invite candidates came to interview,

20 interview to conduct,

50 calls to update candidate profiles,

50 data to key in,

12 resume out

that not include job matching, answer calls, attend walk-in candidates, photocopy, administrative works....etc...

all this tasks take more than 13 hr to finish,

but we only work 9 hr,

wow,

when i read the target,

i feel a sense of cant be accomplish,

then i so kepo that i suggest to my manager,

told her the calculation,

at the end,

she require me to do proposal....

this proposal make me tense for few day,

i headache doing it,

i seem simple yet to make it not offend,

it damn hard!

i straight have discussion with other intern and gathering their thought,

to make calculation less ideal yet realistic,

i do simple test and record the time,

from source,

i know my manager wont change target no matter what,

so i know i useless to suggest her to reduce target,

i turn it to other way,

and make it became a target review which show her analysis of time to complete those tasks.

finally i submit on friday,

after i submit i really blame myself for being kepo,

doing what i should nt do,

however, if time turn back,

i still do the same,

from that i learn a valuable reason,

dont find trouble and dig a hole to step in.

after all the interns in,

i found out previously i been treat unfair,

i suppose to have more training before on job,

but they let me went explore without guide,

it let me walk the path i should not,

let me fall and got scolded,

then,

due to many interns,

they have much more advantage than when i was the only intern,

when my colleagues said,

please slow down, our new intern cant follow,

what the hell,

when i was new,

no one even stop down for me,

not only that,

they approach me to ask me what to do,

last time i had no one to approach when doubt,

when ask,

i had to take risk being scold,

it seem like new interns been guide and help,

our company seem spoon feed them,

while me,

they let me go by my own,

the more i saw,

the more i felt unfair...

now i even have to teach them,

that not the task of their supervisor?

i wonder,

we are same,

as an intern,

but differ treat,

what more irritate is,

i felt i m stupid,

they work on time,

leave on time,

while me n one of intern, always ot!

this few day,

i really felt imbalance,

i asked many why?

all those of why which dont have answer!

i understand unfair always happen,

i more realize and experience how cruel the world out here,

to make me feel better,

i always told myself,

thank to those people who make you life suffer,

they let us grow!

maybe i should thank them,

for being such difficult person to deal,

they make me realise a lot,

they make me have a great hard moment!

that i wont never forget how much lesson they have taught me!

sometime i dont understand myself,

why i always dig a hole and make my life difficult,

i have easier and better choice,

i dun have to go though all this suffer,

it make me flash back,

when i went all the trouble to study psychology,

it just like today,

i can choose work at government or go back my hometown to work,

but i choose work at the hectic and materialistic city,

decide to take challenges and bear the target they require!

but sometime,

bad moment doesnt mean everything bad,

i always said,

they are angel appeared when dark,

when i feel bad,

luckly i had good social support,

after i talked to some people

i feel better and more comfort,

after all i vent all my negative thought and unhappy,

this week one of happy things is i attended career fair at ucsi,

it was great experiences,

it was the most relax day since the day i worked,

i manage to know new friends,

and talk to some new faces,

coincident,

i met previous intern at my company,

we chat a while,

and i know a lot things from her,

as i said,

there always a window open follow by close door,

i feel gratitude for that!

after all the negative,

i should adjust my thought,

there no way for me to change workplace,

nor the people they,

i cant change the way they treat me,

just change my percepts much more possible n easier,

after all,

they are my life sifu,

teach me all the hardship and difficulty,

be positive,

is one of the way to support me walk thought the another month,

i had gone thought one month,

just only one more month,

let make it the better one...

remember,

i can choose,

i can choose to be positive

and

i can choose to be happy,

no one can control that,

only ME!

ganbatte.....

let make next week another leap!

3rd week of internship journey

this week,

thing progress to more better.

as many things have become routine,

and i have ready to harvest the seeds...

i did have higher improvement on send resume out,

i achieve my target,

then my supervisor increase my target to 10 by today.

that is target of permanent consultants,

it great challenge....

i did close sale this week,

but it end up,

the candidate resign after 2 day work,

i duno why i keep fail close sales for 2 time...

maybe late of luck.

i went to client visits last friday,

it was a suddenly news,

i know at last minute.

i dun feel want to go,

along the way was suck....

cause i with my colleague din said much,

it was like walked with stranger,

still,

the relationship with my colleague need more improve,

i still have much space in term of communication skills,

during sales meeting this week,

i volunteered to demo invite candidate to interview,

i done some mistake,

i still duno at workspace,

should we performed,

or just low profiled,

sometime, too high profile will cause harm,

that why i keep remind myself keep quiet and said my opinion when it need,

ya,

this week,

i recommend a potential recruitment consultant to hr,

she match all the requirement,

to work at our company,

there many round of interview to go,

start from hr interview,

then to manager,

lastly interview by the boss,

which usually take 2 hr.

sweat!!!

it tougher than got into harvard university.

at the end,

the talent end up hired by other.

in workplace,

we have many differ type of personalities colleagues,

differ type of people we face,

deal with differ type of leadership,

in my office,

i found 2 colleagues who like to act they are more superior than other,

the way they talk seem like boss,

always showed serious face,

keep correct other mistake,

at the end she just a colleague of us,

who simply want to boost how senior they are.

sometime,

i question whether the more senior a person

doesnt that mean that person more better at work?

but what i observed the more longer a person worked,

it doesnt show he/she more better or more perform...

maybe yes,

i still cant see it,

let observe how is it.

this week,

i have achieved my resume target,

next stage

is to achieve more sales,

good luck,

for this week,

hope more positive report on next week.

2nd week of intern journey

it leap to 2nd week,

time really rocket!!!

as day pass,

i more adapt with the new environments,

things getting easy as it turn routine,

when routine,

it mean it can control under my subconsciousness,

then it took less of my mental effort,

by the way,

this week turn to be more better,

some work have become routine,

like data entry,

update candidates details,

calling and invite interview,

job matching,

answer phone calls

and etc...

this week more improvement,

in term of numbers of key in data,

as i was more better and good in finding chance use computer,

i conduct more interview session,

ya this week,

i attended 2 special candidates,

one is a senior manager which from indian,

it was my mistake that i forgot we din help foreigner look for job,

i end up interview him but sorry i cant help him got job,

another candidates is 50+ yr old man,

i was so stupid that i called him for interview,

i forgot check the age,

it not age discrimination,

but realities is no company wan too old man for clerical job,

it so strange tat this person who 50 yr old

looking for clerical job,

he has knowledge of outside world,

he speak fluent english,

but when i asked him why he apply clerical job

he said after all this is the more easier job...

really???

i did suspect him,

whether he is spy from my company

who want to evaluate my performance,

or he is the recruitment auditor???

but he seem wear simple,

a child look watch,

carry a helmet with him,

i was confuse,

are he serious looking for job?

it end up i cant help him.

however,

time will let me noe,

which category he is~

then what the best things in this intern is

the platform for me to speak english,

i speak all the day,

surround by fluent speaker,

all of my colleague speak fluent english,

i guess i was the one with poor english,

however i can learn from them,

i still need learn communicate with them,

still, this week better relationship with them,

yet not reach my expectation....

this week i reach my daily resume out target,

i managed to give5 resume out on last fri,

with another good news i close sales,

but sadly,

the candidate din start work and cant be contact,

it make me happy at first and sad at the end,

my first sales end up unsuccessful,

when i think of my sales target,

i sweat and headache,

it need much efforts to reach at short time,

i was kind of worry and stress when think of it,

however,

what i can do is do my best.

lesson i learn this week is,

1)people tend to remember the mistake u make

but forget how much you can contribute,

2)the work life always fill with loneliness

3)i always remember what my boss told me,

u been here, because we think u value more that we pay.for sure, i received for quarter of the value i work.

4)is prove i m workaholic!i cant stop working even at home. all my mind is about work, work,WORK!!!.

5)alert at work, even a small insignificant action will cause you a lot trouble.

some lesson i learn from my colleagues,

when they make a mistake,

i try learn from they mistake,

before i did the same,

while the mistake i made,

i never let it happen again....

it was a good news that i will involve in career fair next week,

so happy i given a chance,

it was a great learning,

hopefully it din disappoint me,

sometime i in dilemma,

at certain moment,

i love what i done,

since i rarely feel tired when i work,

i din wishes the day end early,

but today,

i feel want go back asap,

since tomorrow was holiday.

that all for this week,

i hope coming week i can wrote something good and positive,

i got some interesting happening to write,

hope this week will be another great leap!